Chill Out!!

It’s hard to remember how it felt before

Now I found the love of my life

Passes things, get more comfortable

Everything is going right

And after all the obstacles

It’s good to see you now with someone else

And it’s such a miracle that you and me are still good friends

After all that we’ve been through

I know we’re cool

I know we’re cool

We used to think it was impossible

How you call me by my new last name

Memories seem like so long ago

Time always kills the pain

Remember Harbor Boulevard

The dreaming days where the mess was made

Look how all the kids have grown, oh

We have changed but we’re still the same

After all that we’ve been through

I know we’re cool

I know we’re cool

Yeah, I know we’re cool

And I’ll be happy for you

If you can be happy for me

Circles and triangles

And now we’re hanging out with your new girlfriend

So far from where we’ve been

I know we’re cool

I know we’re cool

C-cool, I know we’re cool

I know we’re cool

Sometimes, we put too much passion on the biggest dreams and priorities in life that we fail to love the smallest pleasures from simple things. We search so much for the right choices, for the right paths to walk through, for the right time and for the right reasons. But life isn’t about searching for the things that can be found. It is about letting the unexpected happen and finding things you never searched for.

In life, we always search for answers because we want to prove ourselves that we had the right decisions. But the truth is we can’t search for what’s not there. Things happen because it’s meant to happen. That’s why we forgive people even if they hurt us, we love people who don’t love us and we smile despite every painful crash in our hearts. At the end of the day, the lesson we get are the answers to our decisions.

i’m not getting any younger, i realized that just now. due to the sudden loss of my job, i’m a bit depressed. so instead of binging & eating my heart out, my friend (she lost her job too) & i (secret nalang kung si kinsa akong friend..) decided to go to a gay bar. yah, you read that right, a G-A-Y B-A-R. it was our first time to go into that place, and we solemnly swear to never go back to that place. NOT EVER!!! and for the first time in my life, i’ve seen guys wearing panties. nyahahah!!!! while watching them dancing & wiggling their bodies (no kidding, they’re really wearing panties… polka dotted ones, and the color is PINK!!), i could hear my own heart go, "TAGDAG… TAGDAG…. TAGDAG…" pisting giatay niduol bitaw, kaila ka’g wa mi katingog??!!! abi gyud tingali nila mga matrona na jud mi’g dagway, P200 ra ang among kwarta. para muhawa sila, respetar nalang sa ilang sayaw na walang ka grace-grace, gisuksukan nalang namo ang ilang "panties" ug P20. nyahahahh!!! maygani dili sinsiyo. pagkahuman, nanggawas mi oi giahak nala’y kuwang. as in i swear, im never going back to that place. nengneng…

hey, ma. musta na? i dreamt of you the other night, it makes me miss you even more. how i wish you’re here, ma. i know you’re in a better place right now, and the mere thought of it makes me feel happy. i want to see you, ma, just let me know you’re ok. if you do, i’ll be at peace. and there are so many things that i wish to tell you, i just wish you’re here to listen all of it. i want to let you know how much i love you…

i will be starting my new quest in manila, i’ll be going right after i receive my final pay. i’m thinking of my younger brothers: chum, bjorn and baldo. i figured that they won’t be there when i need them the most, i’ll be by myself in manila. it’s just so sad to think that we need to be miles away from each other for survival. i just realized how i need them so bad in my life, they’re my living stress reliever. they’re my "bastions of security," i never hesitate to call them & seek sanctuary when i have any problems. they are my own cheerleading squad, they always cheer me up when i’m feeling lonely and sad. they are my own private army, this has been proven & tested when a couple of a**holes left me burning in hell with a 700-peso bill needed to be paid. they’re ready to kill those sh**heads, a fat faggot & a balding son of a b**ch. so if those 2 despicable creatures have read this, they better have their last will & testament prepared. and so much for those good for nothing craps, let’s go back to my 3 rascals. i prepared a letter for them & i will give it to them before i leave for manila. i always tell them to let me know if they need anything, i will try my very best to provide them what they need. iam about to cry right now, i’m going to miss my brothers.